If you were raised like me, you were brought up to believe the following:
😮 People are SUPPOSED to LIKE you. .
😮If you’re doing it right, people WILL LIKE you.
😮If they don’t, there’s either something wrong with them, or something wrong with YOU.
😮It’s very important that people LIKE you. It’s bad to be unliked.
When I was young, my school would regularly have “field trips”. I distinctly remember my mother asking me to call friends the night before any school trip to make sure I had someone to sit next to on the bus the next day. The message being sent was:
😨 It would be BAD to sit alone on the school bus.
😨If you’re liked, you’d always have someone to sit with.
😨Only unpopular kids would sit alone. It’s not good to be alone.
😨There’s something wrong with you if you sit alone.
In these ways, and in so many other examples, my mother BADLY wanted me to be liked (and, by as many people as possible. Nearly everyone!). What I’ve realized since childhood, is this:
😎 NOT everyone is always gong to like you, and that’s okay.
😎You are not FOR everyone, and everyone is not for you.
😎You don’t need to worry, feel anxiety, or try so hard to be liked.
😎Sometimes, people won’t like you. There’s nothing wrong with that.
😎Sometimes when you’re doing you’re very best, and courageously being yourself, you’re going to alienate people even MORE.
😎YOU get to define what success is- and for yourself.
😎Worrying about what other people think (who may have different goals, values, or beliefs than you) often prevents YOU from following your own heart and doing what YOU think is best.
😎Trust yourself. Following your OWN purpose or vision statement leads to the MOST happiness.
I know it can be scary or hard to not be “liked”. Sometimes, the better you do, and the more you rise, the more people DON’T seem to like you. That’s okay. Sometimes it’s a matter of you making them uncomfortable by being so self-assured, and by marching to the beat of your own drum.
Wanting to be liked by everyone can come from a place of our own EGO or arrogance. Or, it can come from a place of anxiety and an idea that we’re perfect, and everyone should know it. It also occupies space in our minds; time which could’ve been better spent on how we’re going to save the planet or rule the world!
In short, if someone doesn’t like YOU because of how you uniquely show up as YOU- then let it go. Don’t waste time on convincing or persuading them. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not important.
#leadership #leadershipdevelopment #beyourself #followyourdreams #followyourheart #trustyourself