I was bullied in middle school.

I’ve known for awhile that probably served as some form of childhood trauma.

I also knew that I never talked to anyone about it. I was alone in it.

I’d figured out THAT probably served as some form of childhood trauma, too.

But, what I DIDN’T think about or consider until just recently was this:

The fact that I felt I couldn’t speak to anyone around it most likely means that the REAL childhood trauma happened BEFORE the bullying started.

Something had ALREADY happened that made me feel as if I COULDN’T speak to anyone about it. Made me feel I had to suffer alone; be in it alone.

WHOA. That was mindblowing.

Childhood traumas are a BIG DEAL. Especially when we don’t take the time to go back and become aware of them, unpack them, and understand them, they can affect us for the REST of our LIVES. They can affect how we show up in our professional and personal relationships- and most importantly, our relationship with OURSELF.

The better we UNDERSTAND our past traumas (what they were, when they occurred, and (all) the ways in which they affected us) the BETTER we’re able to heal and recover from them.

So, it was really enlightening to realize that me being alone in the bullying, and not feeling I had a safe place to SPEAK UP about it, was the REAL trauma.

Recently heard this concept from Gabor Mate through Mel Robbins, and it was like a bright light bulb instantly illuminated for me!

Would love to get anyone’s thoughts on this! trauma childhoodtrauma bullying